DUKE NUKEM FOREVER

As it stands, Duke Nukem Forever is still set to be released on respectively june 10th for international and 14th for North America. Some have already claimed the apocalypse is nearing and some are regretting past made jokingly done bets already. After many years of waiting, for older ones among us that can remember the initial announcement in April 1997 even more so, it looks like it's finally happening.

 

For the people who weren't old enough to have been partying like it's 1999 when we finally hit that big "2-triple o" it might all seem like a big riddle as to why this game is being so hyped again lately. Well, it's not in the graphics or gameplay in my opinion, nor is it a game you'd want to sit down for and play on hardcore with the idea of it being the next FPS on the list, nor is it smart to have great expectations about some grand Final Fantasy-esque storyline. Duke is just a franchise that is to be enjoyed with a cold pack of beer (or soda for the minors) on a lazy sofa on an evening after a rough day at the job. Its over the top humour and gameplay, scaling from sexual puns to cheesy one-liners to gigantic monsters crushing skyscrapers that you have to fight single-handedly is just pure Duke to the Nukem again in this final installment.

Now what I'm saying might sound  like the next "OMG IT'S SUCH A COOL GAME" preview. But I'm serious here. Duke Nukem Forever is probably the MANLIEST game you will ever play. The game has beefy guys, big guns, crap flinging (or not, darn you April fools!), sweet sweet sexualized polygons and non-stop pedal to the metal action!  If you aren't offended by realistic vibrator physics, lesbian make-outs, strippers, gory violence and a handful of the most masculine gameplay you'll ever get then go pre-order Duke Nukem Forever now or be a pansy forever.

Also about those lesbian schoolgirls:

Written for Derion.org by Rain